Teh One Who Knocks
07-04-2019, 11:11 AM
By Nick O'Malley | Penn Live
https://i.imgur.com/hSd2WUg.jpg
The KFC Cheetos chicken sandwich is orange Thanos. It is inevitable. It’s a glimpse into the orange void, a cheese-dusted self reflection into the most hedonistic parts of your psyche.
A fried chicken sandwich with Cheetos and Cheetos sauce on it? Yeah, it’s a great idea, handed down from a corporate juggernaut whose annual revenue has dwarfed the GDP of Liechtenstein.
So, yes, it’s a good sandwich, KFC. You encased your hit-or-miss chicken in a glorious veil of synthetic cheese. The bright, sharp flavors of the Cheetos marry wonderfully with the satisfying bit of the chicken. There, are you happy now? You have my $5.39 -- and my dignity.
KFC Cheetos Chicken Sandwich
This sandwich is a precarious Jenga tower of junk food. It doesn’t leave a mess. It leaves a crime scene.
This handheld jalopy starts with the usual hunk of fried white-meat chicken that’s coated in a nuclear orange-looking Cheeto sauce. It looks like a cross between Buffalo sauce and a “Macaroni and Cheese” crayon. That’s then stacked on top of a bed of Cheetos and a layer of mayonnaise.
Structurally, it holds together surprisingly well. But that cheese sauce doesn’t have a tendency to creep out and get everywhere. I ate this thing and felt like I’d just committed a cheesy homicide against the Syracuse mascot.
The worst part is that it doesn’t even feel like I committed the crime particularly well. “Who did it? I think it was the guy with cheese dust on his hands and regret in his face.”
Yeah that’s right you caught me orange-handed.
https://i.imgur.com/VmdR7Pc.jpg
The inner workings of the KFC Cheetos chicken sandwich
So what does it taste like?
Probably the best part of this sandwich is the fact that it has a really satisfying crunch on two levels, one from the exterior of the chicken and one from the crunch of the Cheetos.
It’s got a little bit of tang, but falls short of heat. It’s got a little more of a kick than a normal fried chicken sandwich, but falls well short of “spicy chicken” territory. The cheesy sauce does a good job of breaking up the starchiness of the bread and chicken, which is good because the chicken wasn’t particularly juicy.
The mayo is a curious inclusion, but ultimately balances out the Cheeto sauce, which is quite potent. It’s like distilled Cheeto paste. You need to cut it down. The human body can’t handle the pure stuff. The Cheetos on my sandwich were miraculously still crunchy and carried the taste of the Cheeto dust.
If you’re trying to improve a subpar chicken sandwich, this is a good way to do it
Is it any good?
Yes, despite my better judgment.
The cheese flavor is actually pretty good. It combines that satisfying weight of the chicken with that little cheesy zip from the sauce the Cheetos.
Physically, It’s satisfying to eat -- albeit potentially draining emotionally.
The final word
Junk food mashups tend to be pretty good, largely because they tend to carry familiar flavors that are cartoonishly bold at times. While some people could sour on those flavors over the years when eating the actual foods, the process of distilling those flavors down into a seasoning can still be palatable.
It makes sense. Some folks would think twice about eating Doritos. They’d also think twice about eating raw paprika. But if you take that same ingredient and weave it into something more conventional -- like chicken -- all of a sudden you now have a dish worthy of submitting to the judges on “Chopped.”
https://i.imgur.com/hSd2WUg.jpg
The KFC Cheetos chicken sandwich is orange Thanos. It is inevitable. It’s a glimpse into the orange void, a cheese-dusted self reflection into the most hedonistic parts of your psyche.
A fried chicken sandwich with Cheetos and Cheetos sauce on it? Yeah, it’s a great idea, handed down from a corporate juggernaut whose annual revenue has dwarfed the GDP of Liechtenstein.
So, yes, it’s a good sandwich, KFC. You encased your hit-or-miss chicken in a glorious veil of synthetic cheese. The bright, sharp flavors of the Cheetos marry wonderfully with the satisfying bit of the chicken. There, are you happy now? You have my $5.39 -- and my dignity.
KFC Cheetos Chicken Sandwich
This sandwich is a precarious Jenga tower of junk food. It doesn’t leave a mess. It leaves a crime scene.
This handheld jalopy starts with the usual hunk of fried white-meat chicken that’s coated in a nuclear orange-looking Cheeto sauce. It looks like a cross between Buffalo sauce and a “Macaroni and Cheese” crayon. That’s then stacked on top of a bed of Cheetos and a layer of mayonnaise.
Structurally, it holds together surprisingly well. But that cheese sauce doesn’t have a tendency to creep out and get everywhere. I ate this thing and felt like I’d just committed a cheesy homicide against the Syracuse mascot.
The worst part is that it doesn’t even feel like I committed the crime particularly well. “Who did it? I think it was the guy with cheese dust on his hands and regret in his face.”
Yeah that’s right you caught me orange-handed.
https://i.imgur.com/VmdR7Pc.jpg
The inner workings of the KFC Cheetos chicken sandwich
So what does it taste like?
Probably the best part of this sandwich is the fact that it has a really satisfying crunch on two levels, one from the exterior of the chicken and one from the crunch of the Cheetos.
It’s got a little bit of tang, but falls short of heat. It’s got a little more of a kick than a normal fried chicken sandwich, but falls well short of “spicy chicken” territory. The cheesy sauce does a good job of breaking up the starchiness of the bread and chicken, which is good because the chicken wasn’t particularly juicy.
The mayo is a curious inclusion, but ultimately balances out the Cheeto sauce, which is quite potent. It’s like distilled Cheeto paste. You need to cut it down. The human body can’t handle the pure stuff. The Cheetos on my sandwich were miraculously still crunchy and carried the taste of the Cheeto dust.
If you’re trying to improve a subpar chicken sandwich, this is a good way to do it
Is it any good?
Yes, despite my better judgment.
The cheese flavor is actually pretty good. It combines that satisfying weight of the chicken with that little cheesy zip from the sauce the Cheetos.
Physically, It’s satisfying to eat -- albeit potentially draining emotionally.
The final word
Junk food mashups tend to be pretty good, largely because they tend to carry familiar flavors that are cartoonishly bold at times. While some people could sour on those flavors over the years when eating the actual foods, the process of distilling those flavors down into a seasoning can still be palatable.
It makes sense. Some folks would think twice about eating Doritos. They’d also think twice about eating raw paprika. But if you take that same ingredient and weave it into something more conventional -- like chicken -- all of a sudden you now have a dish worthy of submitting to the judges on “Chopped.”