Teh One Who Knocks
08-03-2020, 01:41 PM
Babylon Bee
https://i.imgur.com/DMfeR92l.jpg
WASHINGTON, D.C.—President Trump has announced a ban of TikTok after his first video on the platform got zero views, sources confirmed Saturday.
Trump reportedly worked really hard at the video, recording over 70 takes until he found one he liked. In the video, Trump does an "excellent performance" of the Macarena. He was reportedly really proud of the video and so was crestfallen when he got no likes or views after a few minutes.
"It's obviously a dumb platform with only stupid people," he wrote on Twitter. "My video was clearly the best on the platform, and if America doesn't get that, then America doesn't deserve to use TikTok. People on there were doing the dumbest dances: the Renegade. That dumb 'na na na' song. No one was doing the classics. Whatever happened to the YMCA?"
No matter the reason he banned the app, Trump's approval rating shot up thirty points on the announcement.
https://i.imgur.com/DMfeR92l.jpg
WASHINGTON, D.C.—President Trump has announced a ban of TikTok after his first video on the platform got zero views, sources confirmed Saturday.
Trump reportedly worked really hard at the video, recording over 70 takes until he found one he liked. In the video, Trump does an "excellent performance" of the Macarena. He was reportedly really proud of the video and so was crestfallen when he got no likes or views after a few minutes.
"It's obviously a dumb platform with only stupid people," he wrote on Twitter. "My video was clearly the best on the platform, and if America doesn't get that, then America doesn't deserve to use TikTok. People on there were doing the dumbest dances: the Renegade. That dumb 'na na na' song. No one was doing the classics. Whatever happened to the YMCA?"
No matter the reason he banned the app, Trump's approval rating shot up thirty points on the announcement.