Man tries to have sex with beer can, ends up in hospital

[Teh One Who Knocks]

By Jay King - Whizba News


http://i.imgur.com/Zj22z5x.jpg

A man from Florida has been taken to hospital with severe cuts to his genitalia.

The unnamed and rather embarrassed man from Barto reports to have been out in the town trying to find a lady friend to mate with, when he came home on his own, on Wednesday.

The Florida man said that he was "extremely horny". That's when he grabbed an empty beer can, and began to "try to make love to it".

It was "about 2 pumps in" that he felt water dripping off of his private area, and he looked down to find that it was blood.

The injury occurred when the 23-year-old twisted the can, ever so slightly, and split the skin. Still humping whilst doing so.

The man's penis was 'cut to ribbons' and will need surgery, the hospital expects he will have a full recovery within a few weeks.

[redred]

:shock: are your cans the same as ours over here ie small holed and sharp ? why just why ?:lol:

[Goofy]

How did the human race ever evolve? :facepalm:

[Teh One Who Knocks]

:shock: are your cans the same as ours over here ie small holed and sharp ? why just why ?:lol:

http://i.imgur.com/EFNT00U.jpg

There's a picture of a can with a pen for scale...just took it :lol:

[FBD]

:lol: poor lil fucker that can fit his wiener in that

[deebakes]

apparently he can't fit it in easily :lol:

[redred]

http://i.imgur.com/EFNT00U.jpg

There's a picture of a can with a pen for scale...just took it :lol:

:lol: yes same size hole as ours ie not big enough for a normal penis to fit in

[perrhaps]

:lol: yes same size hole as ours ie not big enough for a normal penis to fit in

Says who?

[redred]

Says who?

prove me wrong :lol: i want a signed can with penis inside it picture sent to Hal :tup: first one who does wins a prize

[Hal-9000]

Crack open a cold one dudes! :dance:




:first: :)

[Hal-9000]

prove me wrong :lol: i want a signed can with penis inside it picture sent to Hal :tup: first one who does wins a prize


:x


I already got a folder full of those....from the days of Hal's Hole




:dance:

[PorkChopSandwiches]

I got hard inside a Micky Big Mouth bottle and had to have the fire department remove it

[Hal-9000]

I got hard inside a home made baloney sandwich with Cheez Whiz, didn't need the fire department.....the elastics were too tight :|


:mybad:

[PorkChopSandwiches]

:homer:

[Hal-9000]

I got hard inside a Micky Big Mouth bottle and had to have the fire department remove it


:-k


http://i58.tinypic.com/mlqgjb.jpg

[PorkChopSandwiches]

Thats the one

[PorkChopSandwiches]

Only after drinking malt liquor does it sound like a good idea. :dance:

[Hal-9000]

great...another thing that won't touch my lips now :|

[PorkChopSandwiches]

My tip? :(

[Hal-9000]

:gotthattshirt:

:tup: