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redred
02-12-2015, 01:05 PM
http://i.imgur.com/iDt3vIL.jpg

A South Wales husband has filed for divorce from his wife after she fanny-farted in his face during a romantic interlude.

Bob Gubbins from Trefforest was ‘sipping from the furry cup’ in a pre-Valentine’s night get-together when his wife Julie, let rip with a front bum arse-ripper. Bob suffered first-degree burns to his face and also lost several of his eyelashes in the eruption.

Bob told WalesOnCraic:

“There I was, minding my own business when she lifted a cheek and BOOM! I didn’t know what had happened. My hair was blown off my head and my eyelashes simply vapourised there and then. To make it worse, she laughed when it happened, and I got an aftershock straight to the face. I blame the curry house for the nuclear curry they served up to us the night before but I simply cannot allow my wife to get away with this. I’m taking her for everything she’s got, including the microwave, which is technically mine anyway because I paid for it on my credit card.”

Julie was repentant after the episode.

“All I want is my husband back. I couldn’t help it. I think my front bum got pumped full of air when Bob was busy tromboning me. Bob thinks it was the curry but it was nothing to do with that. I do hope Bob is ok. I’d hate for him to leave as I’d have to buy my own microwave oven.”

http://www.walesoncraic.com/trefforest-man-files-divorce-wife-fanny-farts-face/

Goofy
02-12-2015, 01:31 PM
"Wales on crack" :thumbsup:

Goofy
02-12-2015, 01:32 PM
Isn't that the dude from Scrubs? :-k

RBP
02-12-2015, 02:06 PM
:wtf:

I don't understand. :lol:

FBD
02-12-2015, 04:48 PM
:lol:

Hal-9000
02-12-2015, 04:49 PM
fanny in this case is vagina, right?

Hal-9000
02-12-2015, 04:49 PM
oh she mentions front bum, my bad



keerist Red :lol:

deebakes
02-13-2015, 01:09 AM
:facepalm:

Hugh_Janus
02-15-2015, 08:39 AM
never heard of this site before.... these are brilliant :lol:

Welsh Men ‘Finishing Fifty Shades Of Grey Movie In Less Than Five Minutes And Then Going To Sleep’


A high proportion of Welsh men are missing out on screenings of the new Fifty Shades of Grey movie after knocking it on the head before their female partners have had time to enjoy themselves.

As the new erotic movie opens to cinemas across Wales, there have already been reports of lads finishing the movie after five minutes and going to sleep.

Movie-goer Brenda Widethigh, who didn’t want to be named, told WalesOnCraic:

“I’d been waiting for this for years. I put on my new frilly knickers and what happens? It’s all over in less than five minutes. Worse still, I haven’t had time to enjoy it and I have to put up with his snoring. The man’s a pig. Do you want to buy him? You can have him for a fiver.”

But one Welsh husband told WalesOnCraic:

“I couldn’t help it. It just sort of happened. I’ll buy her some flowers from the garage on the way home. That’ll make her happy won’t it.”

To mark the opening of Fifty Shades of Grey, Welsh writer Derek the Weathersheep is not offering any discount on his Amazon best-seller Fifteen Grades of Hay, which is available here:

PorkChopSandwiches
02-15-2015, 02:39 PM
English mutha fucka ... Do you speak it

Griffin
02-15-2015, 03:10 PM
‘sipping from the furry cup’

there's one I've not heard before :lol: