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Teh One Who Knocks
11-24-2015, 12:48 PM
The Smoking Gun


http://i.imgur.com/lzp9Fko.jpg

NOVEMBER 23--A strip club patron called cops yesterday to report that he was assaulted by an adult dancer after suggesting that she should “go to the gym and lose weight,” according to a South Carolina police report.

Kyle Yeomans, 23, told cops that he was at Derriere’s Gentlemen's Club in Myrtle Beach early Sunday when the 1:45 AM attack occurred

Yeomans recalled that the stripper was “annoying him and that she kept trying to talk to him and he was tired of it,” investigators noted. Yeomans, pictured at right, told cops that he was drunk at the time, and rated his level of intoxication “an 11 out of 10.”

In response to being annoyed, Yeomans “told the dancer that she should go to the gym and lose weight.” The stripper, Yeomans said, was a white female with long black hair. He estimated that she weighed between 115-120 pounds, and was no more than 25 years old.

Yeomans also reported that his attacker had “a muffin top.”

After receiving Yeomans’s unsolicited fitness advice, the stripper allegedly “reached off the stage and struck him 4 times in the face,” police noted. Yeomans said he was then dragged out of Derriere’s by bouncers who were “unnecessarily rough with him.”

Yeomans, who waited about 17 hours to report the incident, had injuries on his face “consistent with his statement of being struck,” cops reported. Yeomans said that the injuries were caused by the stripper who “was hitting him while wearing a ring.”

Witness Joshua Hillian--a Yeomans buddy--told cops that while he did not hear what Yeomans told the dancer, he did see her “strike the victim in the face 4 times.”

Asked if he wanted to press charges against the stripper, Yeomans replied that he “wanted nothing other than a report” to be filed. Still, an officer sought to follow up on the assault claim, but Derriere’s (seen below) was closed when the cop stopped by Sunday evening.

http://i.imgur.com/P3bfyTL.jpg

HyperV12
11-24-2015, 02:18 PM
:lmao:

Hal-9000
11-24-2015, 06:12 PM
Back in the day we were carrying on loudly and not paying attention to the skank dancing in front of us...she decided to admonish us and screamed 'pay attention to the pussy!'

My buddy screams back - Lose some weight ya cow you look like my Mom!

we were escorted out :)

PorkChopSandwiches
11-24-2015, 07:03 PM
Still, an officer sought to follow up on the assault claim, but Derriere’s (seen below) was closed when the cop stopped by Sunday evening.

http://i.imgur.com/P3bfyTL.jpg

Of course he wanted to follow up

DemonGeminiX
11-24-2015, 09:20 PM
Maybe fat chicks shouldn't be strippers.

[-(

HyperV12
11-24-2015, 11:13 PM
I'd hardly say 115-120lbs is fat, unless she's 4'6" :nono:

deebakes
11-25-2015, 03:12 AM
isn't that a mix-a-lot lyric? :lol: