Writing Exercise: Write me a note for the foul phantom dumper at work
Ok here's the scoop. Our office is on the 18th floor of a nice office tower downtown. My office occupies half, while the other half is a few other offices: A weird Asian foreign investment company (who I suspect to be at fault because maybe I'm a racist), a lawyer's office, and a finance firm.
For the past 6-months, someone has been W R E C K I N G the stall in the men's bathroom. I'm talking clogging an industrial strength toilet to the point where our poor janitors need to wear plastic to unfuck the situation. I'm talking the hugest shits you've seen in your life, along with several yards of toilet paper both in and around the toilet. Whoever is doing this is a sadistic, troubled piece of shit. I'm not sure if they're afraid to flush as they go, simply don't care, or get some sick pleasure out of it.
The guys in my office are incredibly fed up but haven't caught anyone in the act yet. If I catch the guy I'm not even sure what I'll do :lol: It's the worst serial shitting I've seen in my life, far worse than anything I even saw in high school bathrooms.
SO, if anyone feels creative, take a stab at writing your angriest, most shaming note you can dream up to belittle a turd monster for all mankind, and I'll post it in the bathroom at work. The only requirement is that it can't be blatantly threatening because I feel that would be a bad idea.
I'll post my draft shortly :lol:
