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Thread: Jailer: Inmate hid 30 items in rectum

  1. 02-15-2011, 06:56 PM #1
    Teh One Who Knocks
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    WTF Jailer: Inmate hid 30 items in rectum

    The Herald-Tribune


    SARASOTA COUNTY - A homeless man went to court and was arrested on Friday, but the notable part of the story is what he had hidden in his rectum as he stood before the judge.

    The judge sent Neil Lansing to jail, where corrections deputies conducting a routine search in a cellblock found part of a condom sticking out of his rectum, the sheriff's office said.

    According to sheriff's officials, the condom contained: 17 round blue pills, one cigarette, six matches, one flint, one empty syringe with an eraser over the needle, one lip balm container, one additional unused condom, a receipt from CVS pharmacy and a paper coupon.

    Lansing, 33, now faces charges he possessed a drug and a tobacco product inside the Sarasota County jail.

    He is being held there without bail.
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  2. 02-15-2011, 07:00 PM #2
    PorkChopSandwiches
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    Hahahahahaha
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  3. 02-15-2011, 07:00 PM #3
    Joebob034
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    uh-oh looks like you got competition Hal


    I am fixed

    "Somedays I wake up and feel like nobody loves me. Other days I wake up and feel like I love nobody. Sometimes I wake up and feel tired, and worn out. Sometimes I wake up and feel like I cannot face the day. But someday I'll wake up and realize that waking up is pretty stupid because it just makes you feel like crap."
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  4. 02-15-2011, 07:06 PM #4
    Godfather
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    Someone has to ask... pic?!?


    That's filthy... I don't even want to know that logistics of that

    Buddy of mine worked at a grocery store in a fairly scuzzy neighborhood and had people trying to pay with money they'd kept in their ass (the crack at least) a couple times They didn't accept it...
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  5. 02-15-2011, 07:22 PM #5
    Hal-9000
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    only 30...and this is news???
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  6. 02-15-2011, 07:23 PM #6
    Hal-9000
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    Quote Originally Posted by Joebob034 View Post
    uh-oh looks like you got competition Hal
    *shoves JoeBob up his ass*

    laugh it up in the dark chucklehead
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  7. 02-15-2011, 07:28 PM #7
    Joebob034
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hal-9000 View Post
    *shoves JoeBob up his ass*

    laugh it up in the dark chucklehead


    I am fixed

    "Somedays I wake up and feel like nobody loves me. Other days I wake up and feel like I love nobody. Sometimes I wake up and feel tired, and worn out. Sometimes I wake up and feel like I cannot face the day. But someday I'll wake up and realize that waking up is pretty stupid because it just makes you feel like crap."
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  8. 02-15-2011, 07:42 PM #8
    redred
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    a receipt from CVS pharmacy and a paper coupon. why? can these be used in jail
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  9. 02-15-2011, 07:49 PM #9
    PorkChopSandwiches
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    The guy he picked the stuff up for required a receipt for reimbursement
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  10. 02-15-2011, 08:07 PM #10
    RBP
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    Florida - 'nough said
    I wanted to be a Monk, but I never got the chants.
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  11. 02-15-2011, 08:09 PM #11
    PorkChopSandwiches
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    Flo Rida?
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  12. 02-15-2011, 08:13 PM #12
    RBP
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    Quote Originally Posted by PorkChopSandwiches View Post
    Flo Rida?
    I wanted to be a Monk, but I never got the chants.
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  13. 02-15-2011, 08:15 PM #13
    Godfather
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    He looks like the type
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  14. 02-15-2011, 08:32 PM #14
    Hal-9000
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    Quote Originally Posted by redred View Post
    a receipt from CVS pharmacy and a paper coupon. why? can these be used in jail
    Quote Originally Posted by PorkChopSandwiches View Post
    The guy he picked the stuff up for required a receipt for reimbursement
    He must walk really funny around tax time
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  15. 02-15-2011, 10:51 PM #15
    Deepsepia
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    Not included in that list of 30 items: "sense of dignity"
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