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Thread: Air Travel 101

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    Basement Dweller Godfather's Avatar
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    Travel Air Travel 101

    So I checked my Air Canada status today and it looks like I flew over 50,000 miles last year.

    That's a lot of time away from home, in airports and at hotels. It occurs to me that the main thing that bothers me about this isn't crying babies or slow baggage claim, but how inept most adults are at airports and on airplanes, and how it impacts me. People could really help others and themselves with a few really easy tricks.

    • We all know at security you're going to need everything out of your pockets, belt off, hat off, jacket off, probably shoes off (depends on the airport). You'll also almost certainly have to take your laptop/tablet out and put it on a separate bin. So get your shit together in the 25 minute line. Put your wallet and all the other crap in your carry-on, pull out your laptop, have your liquids in a ziplock at the top of your bag and throw away your water bottle. Just the most basic forethought will get you and everyone else through security in seconds once you're at the front of the line, and prevent you from having your anal cavity searched.
    • Overhead bin space is going to fill up. If you don't like that fact, get in line for your zone or check your bag. Standing there arguing with the gate agent expecting them to store your ratty luggage on the Pilot's lap isn't going to happen. And if you don't have a large bag for the overhead bin, fucking relax - you don't need to stand in line 47 minutes before boarding, you're turning the terminal into the Matterhorn line at Disneyland all standing there.
    • Every flight I've been on, domestic or not, you need photo ID along with your boarding pass... why is your wallet suddenly at the bottom of your purse? Get it out before you're at the front of the line ma'am.
    • You can't access your bag during takeoff/landing... we all know this. So why is it that you're sitting there begging for your headphones and waterbottle while we're trying to generate 900,000lbs of lift? Have your headphones, charging cables, snacks, books, and whatever shit helps you and me pass the time in peace, ready to put into the seatback in front of you the second you sit down in your seat. That way, 42 of you don't have to make your entire row stand up and let you out the second Captain turns off the seatbelt sign in flight to go rummage through the overhead bins, because you used your brain and anticipated what you needed before you put your bag away like a good boy.
    • It's going to take 15 minutes after landing to exit this plane, sit the fuck down until you see people 2-3 rows in front of you actually moving. I don't want your stanky ass in my face after it's been farting in a 10 year old rubber seat cushion for the past 6 hours. At the same time, once it's our row's turn, you better be prepared like Tom Brady on Sunday to execute. Have you headphones packed, your jacket on and your gameface ready to move.


    Is this so hard for people?

    /rant
    Last edited by Godfather; 01-06-2023 at 08:39 AM.

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    DemonGeminiX (01-06-2023)

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    Take Box B DemonGeminiX's Avatar
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    Were you just at an airport and noticed these things, or have you been chewing on this for a while now?



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    Music was better when ugly people were allowed to make it.

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    #DeSantis2024 Teh One Who Knocks's Avatar
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    Sounds like someone is trying to get themselves on the No Fly List

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    Basement Dweller Godfather's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DemonGeminiX View Post
    Were you just at an airport and noticed these things, or have you been chewing on this for a while now?

    This has been my private rage for the last year of heavy travel

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    I eat crayons. KevinD's Avatar
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    After flying around the world for a few years, I can completely agree. I point my blame towards the airlines as far as the bags/overhead. Decades ago, there was a small frame you had to fit your carry on into at the check-in desk. If it didn't fit, it got moved to checked , not carry-on.
    My biggest gripe on flying has always been boarding. Mofo, if your rows weren't called out, sit the fuck down. I never worried about de-boarding.
    Newsflash: you can hurry all you want, we are all still going to be waiting at the baggage carousel.

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    Godfather (01-07-2023)

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    Shelter Dweller lost in melb.'s Avatar
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    The secret to a relaxed flight is to "free the feet".

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    Godfather (01-07-2023)

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    Basement Dweller Godfather's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lost in melb. View Post
    The secret to a relaxed flight is to "free the feet".
    I will hurt you.

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    DemonGeminiX (01-07-2023), Pony (01-07-2023), Teh One Who Knocks (01-07-2023)

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    Take Box B DemonGeminiX's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Godfather View Post
    This has been my private rage for the last year of heavy travel
    Quote Originally Posted by Godfather View Post
    I will hurt you.
    I love you, man.



    Warning: The posts of this forum member may contain trigger language which may be considered offensive to some.

    Music was better when ugly people were allowed to make it.

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    Godfather (01-07-2023)

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    mr. michelle jenneke deebakes's Avatar
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    on was on a flight a few months back that everyone stayed seated at the gate after landing until it was their turn to exit. the most shocking and civil experience i have ever had, even made a remark to the flight attendant that was still seated in the exit row with me and they were like, 'this never fucking happens '

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    Shelter Dweller PorkChopSandwiches's Avatar
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    Also keep your shoes on, once on the plane






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    DemonGeminiX (01-17-2023)

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    Shelter Dweller lost in melb.'s Avatar
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    You guys are no fun at all

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