Stranger caught 'pooping' on man's doorstep: 'Can I have two minutes?'

[Teh One Who Knocks]

Laura Koefoed, News Reporter - Yahoo! News Australia




Coming home from a night out ended with a bewildering encounter at the front door for one Melbourne man, after claiming to have walked in on a half-naked young woman propped up on the ground, defecating on the doorstep — an act apparently more common than one may think.

Lynette Nimo, who goes by Netty, says she could not believe her ears when her husband Azza came back to their home in Kew around 10.45pm on Saturday and told her he'd just encountered a "random girl" doing the "biggest poop" he'd ever seen at the front door to their complex. "I was like, 'What are you talking about?'" Netty told Yahoo News Australia. "I couldn't comprehend."

Azza claims he was coming home from the footy and turned into the walkway that led to their front door, where he found the unknown woman with her pants down, midway through her business. He "froze" before asking if she was okay. "Then she says to me in my own house, 'Can I have two minutes?'," Azza said.

Couple laughing off the bizarre pooing incident

In shock, Azza walked back out to the letterbox to wait for the woman as requested, before she pulled up her pants, grabbed her belongings, and left — walking past Azza on the way out with a "smirk" and a quick, coherent "bye". "I can't believe he gave her two minutes," Netty recalled while laughing.

Living in a small complex, the pair reached out to their landlord to share what had happened. The landlord, who has cameras around the complex with one pointing down that very walkway, came the next day to clean up the mess. "He's the only one that has the actual footage of it happening," Netty said.

When asked if they were going to report the incident to the police, Netty shared that they likely wouldn't be on this occasion and were just laughing it off.

Other stories of strangers pooing on people's property

People reacting to the story they shared online were utterly entertained by the encounter. "Tell us everything. No shame to the door pooper," one said. "The fact he gave her a minute!" another laughed.

Though a surprising number of people shared their own poop stories. "My postie took a dump down the side of my house. It was a huge — I was not impressed," one claimed.

"I went to the park by our house last week and someone did this on the park bench seat," declared a second.

"Omg so I had to poop so badly once and did it in someone’s front garden on a main road. I felt so bad but I was gonna poo myself," a third admitted.

On top of this, there have been several reports of people in Melbourne and other major cities being caught defecating on people's properties. In 2023, a public pooer was caught on camera on a busy Sydney road and in 2021 security cameras caught a cyclist taking a toilet break on a stranger's driveway while riding through an affluent Melbourne suburb.

[lost in melb.]

One reason to change the gun laws here