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Thread: redred's bad jokes

  1. #676
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    Quote Originally Posted by DemonGeminiX View Post
    A horse walks into a bar. The bartender leans over and says, "HAY, why the long face?"
    Would have been funnier!

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  3. #677
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    I used to work at a fire hydrant factory. Couldn't park anywhere near that place.


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    Music was better when ugly people were allowed to make it.

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  5. #678
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    What did Mason say to Dixon?

     
    We've got to draw the line right here.


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    Music was better when ugly people were allowed to make it.

  6. #679
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    Quote Originally Posted by DemonGeminiX View Post
    I used to work at a fire hydrant factory. Couldn't park anywhere near that place.
    That was abysmal. Thank you.

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    Why do women always move in groups of 3, 5, 7, 9, etc?

    Because they just can't even.


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    Music was better when ugly people were allowed to make it.

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  9. #681
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    A polar bear walks into a bar. Bartender says “what can I get you?”
    Bear replies ” I’d like a gin… … … And tonic”
    Bartender asks “Why the big pause?”
    The polar bear looks at his hands, turning them back and forth “I don’t know......... my dad had ’em too.”

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    I don't get either of these

  11. #683
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    Quote Originally Posted by lost in melb. View Post
    I don't get either of these
    Younger American women these days will say, "I just can't even" or "I can't even" when faced with an unpalatable choice, among other things. So it's making fun of the phrase. They move in groups of odd numbers, because "they can't even".

    The polar bear joke is a simple word play, pause = paws.


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    Music was better when ugly people were allowed to make it.

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    Thanks. I suppose I should have got the second one.

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    A three legged dog kicks open the saloon door and growls, "I'm lookin for the man that shot my paw."

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    The craziest thing happened at a bar tonight. A woman got her nipple pierced right in front of me!

    ...on an unrelated note, I suck at darts.

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  17. #687
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    I once got fired from a canned juice company. Apparently, I couldn't concentrate.


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    Music was better when ugly people were allowed to make it.

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    If a child refuses to nap, are they guilty of resisting a rest?

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    I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon.

    ... I'll let you know.

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    What key has legs and can't open doors?

    A Turkey.


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    Music was better when ugly people were allowed to make it.

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