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Thread: Goofs random joke thread (do not view if easily offended)

  1. #61
    Dilly dilly Goofy's Avatar
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    I got a call from head office to tell me that two members of staff have accused me of sexism.

    They didn't name names, but I bet it was 'Jenny Shit Tits' and 'Buffalo Cunt'.

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  3. #62
    Dilly dilly Goofy's Avatar
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    How many Americans does it take to change a lightbulb?

    Two, one to change the bulb and the other to provide suppressing fire.


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  5. #63
    Dilly dilly Goofy's Avatar
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    Just visited a shooting gallery in the United States.

    Or, as the locals like to call it, a college.

















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  7. #64
    Sultan of Slit fricnjay's Avatar
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  9. #65
    #DeSantis2024 Teh One Who Knocks's Avatar
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    Too soon?

     
    A Muslim walks into a gay bar and takes a seat at the bar. Bartender walks up and asks what'll it be? And the Muslim shouts, "shots for everyone"!


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  11. #66
    Take Box B DemonGeminiX's Avatar
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    Yes. Too soon.


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    Music was better when ugly people were allowed to make it.

  12. #67
    weapon of mass consumption redred's Avatar
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    yes try again next week

  13. #68
    Take Box B DemonGeminiX's Avatar
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    Now post your version of the Aristocrats, Gilbert.


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    Music was better when ugly people were allowed to make it.

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  15. #69
    Dilly dilly Goofy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Teh One Who Knocks View Post
    Too soon?

     
    A Muslim walks into a gay bar and takes a seat at the bar. Bartender walks up and asks what'll it be? And the Muslim shouts, "shots for everyone"!

    Wow......... better save me a seat on the hell-bus

  16. #70
    Shelter Dweller In Training amex's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Teh One Who Knocks View Post
    Too soon?

     
    A Muslim walks into a gay bar and takes a seat at the bar. Bartender walks up and asks what'll it be? And the Muslim shouts, "shots for everyone"!



     
    ...i did giggle evil me ....

  17. #71
    Mr Magoo RBP's Avatar
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    Gay bar etiquette: It's always polite to ask your date if you can push up his stool.
    I wanted to be a Monk, but I never got the chants.

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  19. #72
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    What's the modern day definition of "mass chaos"?


    Father's Day in Harlem.

  20. #73
    Sultan of Slit fricnjay's Avatar
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    A young man with his pants hanging half off his ass, two gold front teeth, and a half inch thick gold chain around his neck; walked into the local welfare office to pick up his check.

    He marched up to the counter and said,
    "Hi. You know, I just H A T E drawing welfare. I'd really rather have a job.. I don't like taking advantage of the system, getting something for nothing." The social worker behind the counter said "Your timing is excellent. We Just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur and
    bodyguard for his beautiful daughter. You'll have to drive around in his 2012 Mercedes-Benz CL, and he will supply all of your clothes."

    "Because of The long hours, meals will be provided. You'll also be expected to escort the daughter on her overseas holiday trips. This is rather awkward to say
    but you will also have, as part of your job, the
    assignment to satisfy her sexual urges as the daughter is in her mid-20's and has a rather strong sex drive."

    The guy, just plain wide-eyed, said, "You're bullshittin' me!"

    The social worker said, "Yeah, well...
    You started it." .....

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  22. #74
    Take Box B DemonGeminiX's Avatar
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    The nurse told the parents of a newborn, "You have a cute baby."
    The smiling father said, "I bet you say that to all the new parents."
    "No", the nurse replied, "Just to those whose babies are really good-looking."
    The father asked, "So what do you say to the others?"
    The nurse said, "The baby looks just like you."


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    Music was better when ugly people were allowed to make it.

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  24. #75
    #DeSantis2024 Teh One Who Knocks's Avatar
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