I'm going to join a site and need advice...

[Hal-9000]

Admittedly, I don't put much forethought into movie reviews here I watch the show and then a day or so later, try to remember elements and the overall feeling the movie left me with.And I do so without revealing key plotlines...which I hate reading about in other reviews.Lance and I often joke about IMDB reviews.I do use the site though for various reasons.

So I think it's time to join


Suggestions for my username please?

[RBP]

are you asking us to name you?

This will be interesting.

[Hal-9000]

I'm sure there are rules...

I do know that they have people that edit reviews so I may have to curb my shitfucks and Q's...

[Teh One Who Knocks]

You're gonna join IMDB so you can review movies?

[RBP]

CalgaryGeek

[DemonGeminiX]

BlondeButtPirate?

[Leefro]

I just log on through facebook or Twitter

I do not review movies as they don't like my two worded review

FUCKING SHIT

[Hal-9000]

My favorite part of IMDB are the "in a nutshell review" (<--that actually appears in the title section) and the damn monstrosity turns out to be 20 flippin paragraphs

I've yet to see one nutshell review under 1000 words.They also feature reviews that are written by snobs who claim to know the director or actors and they drone on for paragraphs describing comparative lighting effects or the writer's personal difficulties.FFS man did the movie move you in any way? Was it a waste of your 2 hours?

I don't want to hear how you stood in line for some dodgy premiere and your seating problems..

[Hal-9000]

You're gonna join IMDB so you can review movies?

Why not

[Hal-9000]

CalgaryGeek

BlondeButtPirate?

Too close to actual and...too close to actual

[RBP]

BlondeButtPirate?

[MrsM]

Ebert's_Libido

[Teh One Who Knocks]

Why not

Just use your user name from here then

[DemonGeminiX]

Too close to actual and...too close to actual

I should've used Ninja instead of Pirate, shouldn't have I?

[Hal-9000]

Here's an example of a review for Jurassic Park.Please pay attention to the diction and terms used.... This is the low end of the spectrum and I believe I can offer better.


5 out of 45 people found the following review useful:
simply underwhelming, 4 June 2005
1/10
Author: The-Amityville-Horror from United States

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS I remember when this movie came out, every kid in the first grade thought it was all that. I didn't see it until about last month, and i got to say, there's nothing to it.

its nothing but a campy ugly, bad special FX flick. It's really, really bad, I'm not even gonna bother to put spoilers in because I don't want to be reminded of this crappy movie.

don't watch it, the acting is atrocious, there is a scene lifted directly out of THE SHINING (oh you'll see if you don't heed my warning) and the darned kids botch it all to heck.

if i could give it a lower rating than 1, it would be negative 10.

AVOID