Originally Posted by Hugh_Janus
so am on a break from being a retard
about half an hour ago, i nearly put my head through one of those sliding glass window thingys, (like you get at a doctors/bank), im sat in an office above the reception desk and get called to pop my head out to speak to someone, fail to notice its shut and BLAM!!!!
in my defence the cleaners did one hell of a job on it this morning!!
I'll do something pretty much every day that makes me feel like an idiot... you felt like an idiot?
I am fixed
"Somedays I wake up and feel like nobody loves me. Other days I wake up and feel like I love nobody. Sometimes I wake up and feel tired, and worn out. Sometimes I wake up and feel like I cannot face the day. But someday I'll wake up and realize that waking up is pretty stupid because it just makes you feel like crap."
'kin LOLToday - I pulled out a packet of rice crackers and put them on a high shelf. Forgot they were there and spent 10 minutes looking for them
HAHA! Reminds me of the time I walked into a glass door in WHSmith. I was bounding through town into the shop through the double door, then BANG BANG BANG hand, face and knee straight into the door.... The fuck was that?! I'd only chosen the fucker they hadn't unlocked
about half an hour ago, i nearly put my head through one of those sliding glass window thingys, (like you get at a doctors/bank), im sat in an office above the reception desk and get called to pop my head out to speak to someone, fail to notice its shut and BLAM!!!!
in my defence the cleaners did one hell of a job on it this morning!!
2 emplayees opened the other door and asked me if I was ok
I use pens, markers constantly all day at work.Years ago I started the habit of putting my pen behind my ear so I could drive the forklifts, open the doors etc...
this past weekend, I counted 41 pens (of varying ages) in the console cubby hole in my car
I was going on a job interview -- I'd just finished interviewing and ascended a metal staircase. The hem of my trousers was low, the toe of my shoe caught it and whomp my head went straight down onto the top stair on my chin. I then went bang, bang. bang...down the staircase until I hit the landing.
Luckily when my chin hit the top stair I went limp. I had a major cut on my chin and bruises to the front of my body, but came out OK! The guy who witnessed it said he thought I was dead the way I just slid down the stairs. I knew if I tried to stop myself, I'd just tumble down...
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sorry for giggling....I have a similar one
Years ago I was job hunting wearing the only 3 piece suit I had.I went to my interview and was walking outside the building under a bridge.Some guy was approaching me walking the other way and I hear him make that sound like he's going to hawk up a monumental mouthful of lung-butter.Sure enough he does....spits it out and I swear to God it lands right on my shoe!
I said to him - You will clean that up and the guy just smiled and continued to walk past me.....
I lost control....(I was 18 or 19 at the time) I screamed at him - DEFEND YOURSELF!!!! and hockey punched him until he used his sleeve to clean off my dress shoe.He kinda staggered away as I had punched him pretty good a few times.I looked up and saw to my horror that 4 people were walking out of the building I had just applied at....and one guy was the interviewer!!!
I still got the job as security guard making 4 dollars/hour
hahaha!! I swear I'd laugh in your face if you said that to me.... and continue laughing as you hit me. Fuckin LOL. Best way to get beaten up
I was hanging with my buds after the interview (it was summer and most of us didn't have jobs) one bud asked me why my hand was all fucked up after a job interview.I told them the story and for years they screamed - DEFEND YOURSELF! when they saw me at parties etc...they thought I was kind in giving him a warning I guess
And I bet you forget that you have them tucked away there everytime you can't find something to write with too.I use pens, markers constantly all day at work.Years ago I started the habit of putting my pen behind my ear so I could drive the forklifts, open the doors etc...
this past weekend, I counted 41 pens (of varying ages) in the console cubby hole in my car
Exactamondo
I've been at a friend's place..at least one hour after work is finished and they'll ask - What's that behind your ear?
My keys are attached to one of those neck straps because I have a horrible habit of leaving them in the car when I lock the doors and close them, which needing the damn thing in the first place makes me feel like a moron in and of itself...
... but anyway, I was looking for my keys this morning and I couldn't find them anywhere. I was about to go apeshit before I finally remembered where I put them earlier... around my neck.
My keys are attached to one of those neck straps because I have a horrible habit of leaving them in the car when I lock the doors and close them, which needing the damn thing in the first place makes me feel like a moron in and of itself...
... but anyway, I was looking for my keys this morning and I couldn't find them anywhere. I was about to go apeshit before I finally remembered where I put them earlier... around my neck.
I just started wearing glasses recently (I'm still at the denial stage) and rarely take them out with me....I need to get one of those idiot strings because I only need them for close up reading
lmao!!! i've been witness to a similar incident, i swear i tried to help the lady up . . . . . . . . . well i would have if i could have seen through the stream of tears
HAHA! Reminds me of the time I walked into a glass door in WHSmith. I was bounding through town into the shop through the double door, then BANG BANG BANG hand, face and knee straight into the door.... The fuck was that?! I'd only chosen the fucker they hadn't unlocked
I get those D'OH! moments a lil too often for my liking and even more so those moments where you just stand/sit there with a blank expression on your face when someone has asked you a questionok rant over
Today, went to the park with kid and dog, dog is still a puppy and thinks he can eat the ducks. He pulled hard on his leash and it yanked out of my hand, I stepped in an ankle deep puddle of mud while trying to catch dog, as he ran along the lake scaring the ducks and people having a peaceful afternoon feeding the birdies
shmuck
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