Slimy invader poses threat to South Florida plants, pets and people

[Hugh_Janus]

the former

[Hal-9000]

Which the uber appropriate humorous analogy of a victimized minority or the gratuitous beat down by the man?

Elegant post, well phrased sir

[Griffin]

A man goes to a Halloween party with a woman on his back.
The host asks him, "And what are you?"
The man says, “I’m a snail."
The host says, "And who's that on your back?"
And the man says, "That's Michelle!"

[deebakes]

[Griffin]

One fine day a gentleman engrossed in his book heard a tiny knock at his door. Sighing, he put the book down and went to answer it. He opened the door but there was nobody there.
"Stupid kids," he muttered, assuming it was kids playing around. He started to close the door but heard a faint "ahem." He looked down and saw a snail on his WELCOME mat. Annoyed that a snail would interrupt his reading, he picked the mollusk up and threw it across the street. Satisfied, he returned to his reading.
A few months later, as he is reading another book, there is another tiny knock at the door. Again, he opens the door and sees nothing.... until he looks down.
There is the snail again but this time he is holding a tiny sign: "What the hell did you do that for?"