Post what you are thinking at this very moment

[Godfather]

I didn't invite him but we have group POA over everything my Mom owns...so he figures it's a hotel any time he wants.

My sister says I can't say no when he wants to visit

I don't think that's how POA is supposed to work or be used That said, I can see now wanting to stir up shit with family. It makes a fucking mess of estates

Sorry you're having a shit week bud.

[Hal-9000]

I don't think that's how POA is supposed to work or be used That said, I can see now wanting to stir up shit with family. It makes a fucking mess of estates

Sorry you're having a shit week bud.

I didn't want to get too deep into the details...

thanks man

[Godfather]

Can't tell you how close that hits to home. I'm the executor of my late father-in-law's estate. Certain people close to the family saw him as a piggy bank. They were talking about what the house was worth and how fast we'd sell it before he even died. Surprise surprise that same person stole cash and wine too.

The things I've fantasized about doing...

You don't need my advice but all I can say is acting pleasant and professional until it's settled is the only way to go.

[Hal-9000]

I am being pleasant by not hitting him

[Teh One Who Knocks]

He could always have an 'accident'

[DemonGeminiX]

He could always have an 'accident'

He could unintentionally pee himself and Hal could make fun of him incessantly?

[Hal-9000]

He could always have an 'accident'

It got close this morning.

[Teh One Who Knocks]

Trust me my friend, I know how you feel. I haven't talked to my brother in over 10 years now because I can't stand him. I never even let him know when our dad passed away last year.

[Hal-9000]

Yeah I'm nit picking the little things that piss me off and I shouldn't complain here.

But since my Dad died I've been trying to at least mend the fence with him. For my sister. He's treated me like shit since I was a kid, my entire family has seen it...and I'm the one who has to try and make things right. My arm is fucking sore from holding out the same olive branch for so long.

That's shitty with your bro Lance, but I do understand. My brother is a guy who has kept moving further and further away from the city, then our province, then our lives because of his dream to live on a million dollar acreage in the boonies...yet he feels the need to tell me I should be doing more with my Mom for example...to appease his sense of misplaced guilt FOR NOT BEING HERE.

I visit my Mom every few days, every single week at a full time dementia care facility that houses violent, confused, really fucked up people...and one of them is my Mom. I send pictures and give updates on how she's doing, try to spin every visit in a positive light so my sister and brother don't worry, yet the visits are anything but positive.

Then this is the kicker...my brother visits my Ma earlier this week and sees her wearing a shirt that's not hers and eating a piece of pie with her hands. He freaks out, sets up a meeting with the manager and tries to berate her because he feels what he saw constitutes abuse. He has no idea that what he saw is a 'good day', that someone has to dress my Mom and frequently dementia patients will stop eating with utensils because that's a progression of the disease.

Oh man I won't relate what I've fucking seen out of respect for my Mom...but anyone with a family member who has this shitty disease knows what I'm talking about. It reduces people to children and then animals and I'm being polite.

sorry to rant....but it's hard being Little Mary Sunshine when I've been immersed in death and dementia for years and he fucking experiences one minute of it and thinks the world should stop for him.

[Teh One Who Knocks]

Yeah I'm nit picking the little things that piss me off and I shouldn't complain here.

But since my Dad died I've been trying to at least mend the fence with him. For my sister. He's treated me like shit since I was a kid, my entire family has seen it...and I'm the one who has to try and make things right. My arm is fucking sore from holding out the same olive branch for so long.

That's shitty with your bro Lance, but I do understand. My brother is a guy who has kept moving further and further away from the city, then our province, then our lives because of his dream to live on a million dollar acreage in the boonies...yet he feels the need to tell me I should be doing more with my Mom for example...to appease his sense of misplaced guilt FOR NOT BEING HERE.

I visit my Mom every few days, every single week at a full time dementia care facility that houses violent, confused, really fucked up people...and one of them is my Mom. I send pictures and give updates on how she's doing, try to spin every visit in a positive light so my sister and brother don't worry, yet the visits are anything but positive.

Then this is the kicker...my brother visits my Ma earlier this week and sees her wearing a shirt that's not hers and eating a piece of pie with her hands. He freaks out, sets up a meeting with the manager and tries to berate her because he feels what he saw constitutes abuse. He has no idea that what he saw is a 'good day', that someone has to dress my Mom and frequently dementia patients will stop eating with utensils because that's a progression of the disease.

Oh man I won't relate what I've fucking seen out of respect for my Mom...but anyone with a family member who has this shitty disease knows what I'm talking about. It reduces people to children and then animals and I'm being polite.

sorry to rant....but it's hard being Little Mary Sunshine when I've been immersed in death and dementia for years and he fucking experiences one minute of it and thinks the world should stop for him.

Don't be sorry about venting, this is a good place to do so. I understand what you mean completely. My dad wasn't in a dementia ward, but he was in the full care nursing home that was fo, for lack of a better word, poor people. The sounds and noises that came out of that whole section was depressing and scary at the same time. I absolutely dreaded going to visit, but I did, 2 or 3 times a week, depending on how my schedule was. My dad was really out of it towards the end and it was like he wasn't even aware that we were there most of the time, but I still went. So I completely empathize with what you are going thru.

As for your brother, I know you really can't sever ties right now because of your mom, but believe me, cutting my brother completely out of my life was one of the best things I ever did. Like you, I was the one always trying to reach out and be the 'better man' but it got me absolutely nowhere. The only was to feel better when you are constantly banging your head on the wall, is to stop the banging.

[Hal-9000]

My father's death has forced us to cooperate and be together... and my mother when she goes we will do the same thing. Then I will gladly say goodbye to him.

Okay, this has become too dark. /rant

[DemonGeminiX]

Wow, Puerto Rico really needs help badly.

[Pony]

Everything I get to look forward to with my Mom. Hopefully I will get to spend some more time over there this winter.

[DemonGeminiX]

Fly your flags at half staff, my fellow gentlemen. Hugh Hefner has died.

[RBP]

Fly your flags at half staff, my fellow gentlemen. Hugh Hefner has died.

Hugh's flag was never at half staff.