Apparently "and I have a deep regard for you as well." is not an appropriate response when the spousal unit expresses her affection on this most specious of holidays.
Apparently "and I have a deep regard for you as well." is not an appropriate response when the spousal unit expresses her affection on this most specious of holidays.
fuck you kanye
PorkChopSandwiches (02-14-2015)
Let's see.....g/f won't be visiting for another couple of weeks so I'm going to have to do this alone..
*sends ecard to self*
*examines leftover Halloween Kit Kat candy bars, should still be edible*
*uses scissors on 10 yr old briefs to make sexy new banana hammock*
*puts on old Marvin Gaye song*
*gives self handjob while looking away*
Happy Valentines hal-buddy!
RBP (02-14-2015)
I was alllllllmost thinking of asking this waitress out for dinner tonight, but... I slept too late to go get waited on for breakfast
Where's my lotr DVDs go, I dont think I'm going to be doing sheeeeyat tonight
oh wait, fuck that, I should borrow black dynamite from dave, I never watched all of that.
Women still baffle me when it comes to romance....this email conversation happened last night.
*g/f will be coming to visit the first part of March*
g/f - hey babe, i know u dont go out to movies much but when i visit, could we see 50 shades of gray
me - idk...if you pay, maybe..
g/f - lol, always the romantic. im serious, it will be like a valentines thing?
me - sure, sounds like fun
g/f - sounds good, thanks babe (and then some other flattering personal stuff...)
there's one of these 1.7 kms from house and as God as my witness, I WILL BE TAKING HER THERE
if I can somehow get a small bag of popcorn to pull out of my jacket, it will be epic
I never knew a bag of popcorn did that much for a punch
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