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Thread: Police: Man caught masturbating tells officers he's Captain Kirk

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    #DeSantis2024 Teh One Who Knocks's Avatar
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    Floriduh Police: Man caught masturbating tells officers he's Captain Kirk

    WFLA Web Staff




    CLEARWATER, Fla. (WFLA) - Police say a man caught masturbating at a Clearwater bus stop told them he was Captain Kirk.

    Clearwater police were called to a bus stop on Gulf to Bay Boulevard around 11:20 a.m. Monday for a report of a lewd and lascivious act.

    Responding officers say they found a man sitting on a bench touching himself under his shorts. In an arrest report, police noted it was "obvious" the man was masturbating.

    When officers asked what he was doing, the man told them, "I'm scratching myself."

    After the man was arrested for disorderly conduct, police asked him to identify himself.

    The arrest report states the man told police his name was "James Tiberius Kirk," the full name of the fictional character Captain Kirk from Star Trek.

    Police say they later discovered the man's real name is James Bundrick. The 56-year-old is now also facing a charge for providing a false name or identity to law enforcement.

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    Playing with the captains log

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    A perfectly good excuse.

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    I believe him!

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