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Thread: Woman complains of pain in vagina, finds out there’s a dead tortoise inside

  1. #1
    #DeSantis2024 Teh One Who Knocks's Avatar
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    Weird Woman complains of pain in vagina, finds out there’s a dead tortoise inside

    Tanveer Mann for Metro.co.uk




    A British woman who went to hospital after falling ill was shocked to discover that she had a dead tortoise inside her private parts.

    Staff at the A&E department of a medical centre in Tenerife are said to have called police after making the bizarre discovery on Saturday.

    The unnamed woman, described as an expat, had sought help after suffering pain in her genital area which doctors diagnosed as an infection caused by the animal.

    She allegedly told police she had begun to feel odd after going out partying with a group of British friends a couple of days earlier – but had no idea how the tortoise ended up where it did.

    The size of the reptile has not been revealed.

    The medical centre she attended was named as El Mojon in the Arona area of the island.

    The facility, above the holiday resort of Los Cristianos, operates as a small hospital and is eventually expected to become the main southern Tenerife state hospital.

    Health officials declined to comment for data protection reasons, according to local reports.

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    Dilly dilly Goofy's Avatar
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    Mr Magoo RBP's Avatar
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    Ah yes, the important tale of the tortoise and the whore. Life lessons, my friends.

    C'mon, man.
    I wanted to be a Monk, but I never got the chants.

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    #DeSantis2024 Teh One Who Knocks's Avatar
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    The size of the reptile has not been revealed.
    Because size doesn't matter

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    Shelter Dweller PorkChopSandwiches's Avatar
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    He moved in slowly, she didn't notice






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    mr. michelle jenneke deebakes's Avatar
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    like drax

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    weapon of mass consumption redred's Avatar
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    #DeSantis2024 Teh One Who Knocks's Avatar
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    Really? Sex assault eyed after turtle is discovered in woman’s vagina

    By Melkorka Licea - The NY Post


    The British expat who had dead baby turtle inside her vagina, may have been a victim of a sexual assault, police said.

    The 26-year-old woman, who lives on Tenerife in the Canary Islands, had no idea a Chinese three-keeled pond turtle was lodged inside her when she showed up at El Mojon hospital in Arona complaining of abdominal pains, Spanish outlet El PaÍs reported.

    When doctors discovered the dead pet turtle — which caused a “serious infection” in her genitals — they called police last Saturday afternoon, fearing she was abused, ABC reported.

    The unnamed woman told local police she was out partying with a group of British pals Thursday night in the area of Fañabé beach a few days earlier, but doesn’t remember what happened that night, according to El Pais.

    She then started feeling sick over the next few days before going to the hospital.

    The woman insisted she did not want authorities to pursue the strange incident further, and police have halted their investigation pending new information.

    “We are not actively investigating this matter because the woman declined to give a statement,” a police source told The Sun.

    Though initial reports said the reptile was a tortoise, researchers confirmed is was a freshwater Chinese pond turtle, which are sold worldwide in pet stores and can reach up to 12 inches in length, El Pais reported.

    Researchers at first believed the creature was a loggerhead sea turtle because they are indigenous to the the Canary Islands archipelago.

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    mr. michelle jenneke deebakes's Avatar
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    sounds like she put it in there and forgot

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