Man who dated a cockroach for a year and had sex dreams about it says humans aren’t as attractive

[Teh One Who Knocks]

Faima Bakar for Metro.co.uk




They say when you know, you know. One man who knew instantly he’d found the one had to sadly deal with her death when she passed away a year into their relationship.

But ‘the one’ for Japanese man Yuta Shinohara was a cockroach. And because he wanted her to ‘live forever’ within him, Yuta decided to eat his lover. As you do.

Yuta explained to Asian YouTube channel Asian Boss, how he bought the cockroach – lovingly named Lisa – from Africa and even had sex dreams about her.

But don’t worry, he didn’t attempt to do the deed in real life as, you know, ‘the size doesn’t fit’ (his words).


Yuta’s favourite tree (Picture: Asian Boss)

Nature lover Yuta is somewhat of a bug connoisseur in Japan where he’s made a name for himself in insect cuisine. He has organised events serving bug cocktails, insect pastries and ramen with crickets and mealworms.

He even has a favourite tree which he calls ‘heaven’ that he enjoys napping on. Yuta showed the presenter of the channel his fave tree and then proceeded to tell her about his one true love.

When the interviewer asked whether the couple communicated, Yuta replied: ‘It could’ve been my imagination, since I got too attached over time, that I started to feel as if we were communicating.

‘We were 100% serious. No human girl was as attractive as Lisa. Lisa was my first love, I pictured doing it with her many times because I really liked her.

‘I know it’s impossible but I imagined a world where cockroaches become supersized or I become small.’

Makes sense.

But sadly all good things must come to an end. And a year later, Lisa died naturally (cockroaches have an average life span of one year, we checked).

‘The day she passed away was difficult but I knew it had to come since she was a cockroach with a short life span,’ added Yuta. ‘With that in mind, I ate her in reverence. So now, Lisa lives in my heart and continues living as part of my body.’

Though he is still getting over Lisa, Yuta is focused on his appetite for bug cuisine, hoping it comes into mainstream fashion in the future.

Who knows, maybe he’ll find love again making his next dish.

Anyway, here’s the full thing.

[Hal-9000]

yeah ummm ...FUCK THE FUCK OFF YOU FUCKEN FREAK.


I ate her oh man..

[Teh One Who Knocks]

Jealous much?

[Hal-9000]

He only fantasized about having sex with insects.


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