Finally, a New Emoji to Mock Men

[Teh One Who Knocks]

By the Vice Staff




Great news! We’re finally getting an emoji that’s perfect for easily humiliating men when they’re being disgusting online or, you know, being men: the small dick emoji. Officially named “pinching hand,” the emoji has been approved by the Unicode Consortium for release across major platforms this year. It’s also great for illustrating capitalism’s failures by capturing the inadequate minimum wage or your lackluster salary. The possibilities are endless.

Countless men who aren’t secure in their masculinity will be affected by the new option, we know. But it was high time to replace the purple eggplant—which, as a 2015 study confirmed, everyone obviously used as a dick—for something more realistic.

Emojipedia, the emoij catalog that announces updates to the Unicode Standard, announced the launch of the small dick emoji on their blog. This batch includes a total of 230 new emojis, featuring additions such as a wheelchair, a gender inclusive couple, two service dogs, a yawning face, a flamingo, an orangutan, a hang glider, butter, garlic, and more.

Personally, we can’t wait. Come on, update!